


The Heart Wants What It Wants

by mousaerato



Category: Persona 5
Genre: Dream Sex, F/M, Forbidden Love, Hugs, Older Woman/Younger Man, Rough Sex, Secret Crush, Valentine's Day, Warm and Fuzzy Feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-13
Updated: 2019-09-13
Packaged: 2020-10-17 23:54:26
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,214
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20629640
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mousaerato/pseuds/mousaerato
Summary: Even if it can't have it.





	The Heart Wants What It Wants

**Author's Note:**

  * For [robertman2](https://archiveofourown.org/users/robertman2/gifts).

> Another gift for my friend, who was lamenting the lack of Ren/Sae.

“You’re a free man.”

The voice was sunlight to the snow: gentle, warm, yet powerful. With bleary, almost unbelieving eyes, the boy looked at the smiling face that had arrived to give him the news personally – Niijima Sae.

Despite the dark formal attire she wore, the attorney looked _brighter _to Amamiya Ren’s eyes. The narrow, contemptuous eyes with barely-hidden bags and too-dry lips that spat venom and bile with every frustrated word were only images from a nightmare some three months ago; if Ren hadn’t experienced it himself, he’d barely believe the woman who threatened to sign his death warrant was the same sylph that beamed at him now.

A bizarre pain tinged at Niijima Sae’s heart. Those tired, dark eyes were too familiar to her; the images seared into her mind from November 20 played back to her of the youth struggling against sedation and brutality to speak the truth. He was smaller now, with a waxy complexion – a result of poor care and malnutrition – but those eyes still burned with reassurance and confidence. Despite everything he had endured, he still believed in his sense of justice – that same justice that had reawakened in her that infamous night.

It was that reignited judgment that sparked pity in her. Ren had already been through so much, yet it was her own request that put him here. The least she could do for him was be the one to escort him back to freedom and a normal life. Someone like him did not belong in a cell.

With a polite hand, Sae gestured toward the open door in the detention center, asking Ren to follow her lead. He nodded wordlessly and walked with her, still in a haze. Finally, the cruel cosmic game and its very earthly consequences were over. Of all the people he knew and had come to depend on, Ren had to admit that Sae was the one he respected the most – and he was glad he had read her right.

Unlike the thieves, Sae had no supernatural support or power to change her fate, and unlike the thieves’ other targets, Sae’s heart was not changed by force. Over those tense sparse minutes in the interrogation room, Sae proved everything that Ren had hoped the Phantom Thieves would demonstrate to the world: that everyone had the power to change the world for the better, if they were willing to be brave and change themselves. Niijima Sae was the only adult who conquered her own palace and cleared her soul of distortion without her heart being stolen. Everything she did on November 20th to save the leader of the Phantom Thieves from an assassin’s plot was by her own volition and power: no personas, no conspiracy connections, no guns, and no help. For all of that, Niijima Sae was someone special to the young thief.

As they reached the final exit of the detention center, Sae stopped at the door and looked at Ren. She expected that he wouldn’t be in much of a talkative mood – even when he wasn’t locked up, he wasn’t much for conversation – but to leave him with nothing else seemed unprofessional. Unkind, even, with all they had been through together and all he had entrusted to her.

“Sakura-san is waiting for you ou—”

Sae’s friendly sentence was crushed as warm, lean arms encircled her for an embrace. She gasped, unable to think in the moment. Ren rested his head on her shoulder and held her tightly, even as she stiffened in his hold. Before she knew it – before she could stop herself – Sae returned his hug, bringing her arms around him as well.

There were no words sufficient, no words fitting for how they felt towards each other. “Gratitude” felt too transactional, too impersonal; “Joy” was too abstract. “Relief” felt wrong to the tongue and jarred the mind, and “thank you” was simply incomplete. Even though November 20th was only a few moments in a room and a few minutes of a drive, they had connected to each other and changed each other’s lives profoundly and permanently. They understood each other in a way that speech could not explain.

The hug lingered, still without a word, for what seemed an eternity. When they finally parted from each other, both of them breathed sharply, as if to cool off from warm, tense air. They exchanged one final glance, and Ren took his leave, back to his caregiver’s car and the comfort of LeBlanc, still silent and stunned.

* * *

Valentine’s was a chaotic day of chocolates, wrapping paper, and non-stop “dates:” shopping trips, arcade games, park picnics, and movies. The enthusiasm overwhelmed him – did his friends care about him that much, or was it just that he was missing for a few months? There was no way he could eat so much chocolate, no matter how tempting some of them were. While he was grateful for the kindness and normalcy, Ren wanted to go back to LeBlanc and decompress.

As Ren sat at the countertop sipping a coffee, Sojiro teased him. With a playful smile on his lips as he leaned closer, the man asked “What? No special someone tonight?” Boss knew that Ren had been pulled in a million directions, of course, but he was curious that Ren had no explicitly romantic plans.

Ren simply shook his head and looked up with a puzzled look in his wide eyes.

“The way those girls were talking about you,” Sojiro continued, “I would have bet money you were dating one of them. Did it not work out?”

Ren furrowed his brows in confusion. “No?”

“You never asked any of them out?”

The boy took another sip of coffee, desperate to escape Sojiro’s interrogation. The man sounded almost offended.

Sojiro wondered for a moment if maybe he was being…_closed-minded._ Was Ren really this clueless about girls, or was this something else? Nervous about how to broach such a sensitive subject for a young man, Boss offered a more open-ended question. Subconsciously, Sojiro took a step back, as if to give Ren a safe distance. “Well, what’s your type?” 

The dark haired youth closed his eyes in contemplation. In all the bustle and chaos of the last year, Amamiya Ren had hardly any _time _to think about who he’d date or like. There were moments, of course, where he had run-ins with love – meeting “Becky” came to mind immediately – but someone he wanted to date? Someone he wanted to take back to LeBlanc for an evening alone? 

He imagined himself sitting in a booth across from a potential date, sipping coffee and conversing blithely. She had a reserved smile, but bright eyes, with longer hair that framed her face perfectly. “A determined woman,” he started.

_Woman. Ah. _Sojiro listened intently, fascinated – after all, they’d never talked about this. “I see.”

The words came slowly. “Fashionable, but not vain…and smart. Someone competitive.”

“It sounds like you want a career woman,” Sojiro chuckled. His laugh dissipated when he noticed a hint of _red _on his employee’s cheeks. After all the years of working with people from all over Tokyo, Sojiro had become an adept reader of people – he’d hit the nail on the head.

A protective, paternal instinct took over the shop owner. His voice softened, and he gave an understanding smile. “Well, Wakaba was the most hardworking woman I’d ever met. Can’t say I don’t see where you’re comin’ from.”

“Thanks.” The word was small, but breathed with deep relief. “Boss?”

“Yeah?” Sojiro quirked an eyebrow. Ren was never one to open up willingly – this had to be something big.

“What about older women?” The red hadn’t faded from his face; even the boy’s reflection in the coffee had a pink tint.

At that, Sojiro grinned wide and gave a generous _laugh. _“So _that’s _why you didn’t go after any of your classmates, huh?”

Ren’s flustered face, red and overheated, struggled to stay upright and able to look at Sojiro in the eye. He’d never had to think too hard about it, but now he was starting to realize how _weird _he must sound as the description filled the air. All he could manage in his own defense was a simple “I guess;” Sojiro had unintentionally hit him where it hurt again.

“I’m not judging you.” Sojiro’s voice was serious, but compassionate. “You like what you like.” Sojiro placed a hand over Ren’s free one; Ren snapped to alertness.

After the year of false charges, character assassination, death-defying stunts, overwork, and imprisonment, Amamiya Ren deserved to be a normal kid and _happy, _dammit. Sakura Sojiro was determined to do everything he could to help with that noble goal.

“But…there are a lot of people who really like you,” Sojiro said as he looked over to the piles of chocolate boxes in the booths behind them. “Maybe even _love _you. Give someone a chance.”

As Amamiya Ren lay in bed that night, he contemplated his caretaker’s words as he tried some of the chocolates he’d received. He chose a dark chocolate truffle, lacquered with a glossy pitch-black shell and sprinkled with glittering bits of sea salt. The thick coating smeared his lips and melted on his tongue, giving way to a smooth, deep, flavor that overwhelmed him. The bitterness may have been too much for some, but he found himself adoring the contradiction.

Maybe he should try, Ren thought. Obviously, someone understood him enough to make him those truffles.

He tried a second chocolate from the same lavender box, resolved. He would do what Sojiro implored him to do and give someone a chance.

* * *

The warm rays of the May sun lit the busy street. Bodies, faceless, passed seamlessly, the colors of their clothes and flesh blending into a blurred singular fabric. The fabric obscured the glassy buildings, but the light still found their way to them, making them sparkle. The space shimmered with patches of light filtered through the fabric: warm reds, faint pinks, deep purples.

Amamiya Ren’s eyes were laser-focused on his destination. The shocking red, steel blue, violet purple, and electric green gift boxes he held in his hands were cumbersome, but not enough to distract him. Even the sharp click of razor-sharp heels to his right didn’t deter him – if anything, they encouraged him to find this place.

_Where was he?_

A husky laugh filled his ears. “Ren,” the voice lilted with a giggle, “Are you sure those aren’t too heavy?”

He shook his head. “They’re nothing.”

_Click, clack. Click, clack. Click, clack. _

The light, glittering glass, and veil of unknown bodies stretched and undulated, clawing into the fabric of the world Ren and his companion embodied. In a flash, they were transported to a room.

The boxes were littered carelessly on the rich green carpet, spilling their contents: new pens, notebooks, perfume, slate-gray high heels, pantyhose, black lace lingerie—

And further ahead, at the foot of the queen-sized, plush bed, lay a crumpled, disheveled pile strewn across the area: two leather shoes, black two-inch heels, a torn pair of black tights, a white jacket, a black t-shirt, black slacks, a gray blazer, a black turtleneck, jeans, a brown belt, a gold necklace, and earrings.

“Oh, _god _yes,” huffed a husky, dark voice. Her strong, pale legs were wrapped tight around Ren’s waist, pulling him in closer to her. A hand with violet nails tugged at his hair; she needed him closer, deeper, faster. Ren pulled back from her minutely, grunting, before slamming his cock inside her slick heat, balls sapping against her ass as he moved. His lips found her neck, where he licked at the sensitive, sweat-glazed skin, savoring it. As her nails dragged against his back, Ren shifted, bringing his arms to her legs to help her adjust. The woman complied, bringing her ankles to his shoulders to give him full access to go as deep as he wished.

He wanted to savor this sweet, impossible moment. He looked down at the woman beneath him – her flushed skin, heaving breasts, and glossy lips – and sunk into her pussy slowly, savoring the way she clenched around him. When he finally made it to the hilt, Ren breathed a rough sigh, desperate to move. Every _second _of stillness was a challenge of his endurance and willpower.

“Tell me how you want it,” he spoke.

“Harder,” she urged. “Fuck, just cum in me.”

Ren didn’t need to be told twice. He leaned lower, face close to hers, testing her flexibility. He couldn’t help himself – he brought his mouth roughly to hers and plunged his tongue into her mouth. When he hands found their way to his hips to guide him, he finally broke it off, knowing this was no time for _that _kind of sweetness. He pumped into her desperately, punctuating his thrusts with deep _stabs—_

“Oh my god, Ren – Ren—”

* * *

The husky voice had changed to something younger and clearer. “Ren? Ren?”

The boy snapped awake with a confused gasp. Where was he?

“What?”

Warm brown eyes looked back at him from the driver’s seat of the car he was in. “You fell asleep, babe.”

He shook his head, almost laughing at himself. “Sorry, Makoto.”

“Bad dream?”

“Not at all,” he corrected. “Just definitely not possible.”

**Author's Note:**

> The first part of this fic with the hug is an image I've had for a while -- and I kind of like the idea that it left an impression on Ren that he really just wanted someone like that later in his life.


End file.
